We are family, I got all my sisters with me

Aren’t we cute? Clearly I got the looks in the family.

Commuting via public transportation in the city is not a game. It’s just like driving; there are rules to it that you don’t break. When you do break them, it’s usually bad news bears. At Union Station there’s people traveling using up to 10 different forms of public transportation, so you have to move and you have to move quickly. Today, I broke one of those rules.

I got into a little “fender bender.”

I was walking in a lane obviously too slow for the pace I wanted to go and accidentally hit the lady in front of me with my lunch bag. My bag had a pretty substantial container (that makes me sound fat) and an umbrella in it, so it wasn’t a light tap. I was ready to quickly apologize and cover my face in embarrassment of breaking the commuter rules, but she responded in a way I didn’t expect.

“Oh I’m so sorry!” me

“Oh it’s okay!” walk walk walk turn around again “I thought you were my brother!” giggle giggle

Polite giggle from me… “haha, not quite!”

Hearty giggle from her “he likes to sneak up on me and scare me when I’m coming in the station!”

More genuine giggle from me “Ha! That sounds like my brother. They never change.”

Even heartier giggle from her “One day…I’m going to get him back, just watch!” Then she hurried off as her brown straight leg chinos kissed the tip of her bright turquoise Keds.

I smiled and thought well I guess my brother isn’t the only asshole.

Knowing the commuter game, I was all ready to be told about myself or get the look of death. She didn’t do that. That small moment took her back to a memory of the wonderful relationship that many of us are blessed to have: siblings. I’ve never really been besties with my siblings, but we have a decent relationship.

Let me explain mine for a second. I have a brother and a sister. My brother and I are very similar in personality, but he’s well….he’s just Gregory. Let’s just say that. My sister is the oldest and very much so acts, looks, everything like the oldest. We try to act tough, but we know at the end of the day after the parentals, she’s next in line. We are all very different, but like each other just fine.

When the lady thought it was her brother tripping her, it reminded me of the jerk things my brother used to do growing up. For example, one night we were in the mall with the family, but my brother and I split off to walk around alone. In the middle of the mall he decided to trip me and yell “LOOK AT THE FAT GIRL ON THE GROUND!” I cannot make that up. So imagine growing up with that my whole life.

Now, I love my siblings. I’d do anything in the world for them. But in the paragraph before I said, “we are all very different, but like each other just fine.” That to me feels like we’re just putting up with each other. We have our differences and we butt heads like any other siblings, but I feel like we should do a better job of really having a deeper relationship. Admittedly, my brother and I consult each other for a lot advice, particularly around women (because they’re crazy), but the three of us don’t have that deep connection you see between a lot of siblings.

My mom and my aunt are best friends without a doubt. They go on all their trips together and make life plans with each other. They have an account together to save money for their trips. Their next big trip is to Paris. I asked my Mom did she plan on inviting any of us and she said “Oh you know we don’t bring other people with us.” Lol, first off…..what? Ok Charlotte, I’ll let you have that one. But they genuinely enjoy each others company and make sure they sustain that relationship. They enjoy the time they spend together without useless arguments or attitudes and will absolutely do anything for the other.

My siblings and I aren’t quite there yet. I mean we should be, we have been around each other you know 23+ years, but we just don’t have that relationship my mom and aunt have. I’m not sure if it’s a little too later, I don’t think it is, but we are all so concentrated in our own lives that it becomes hard to come together. I’m away at school 90% of the year. My brother is head over heals in love and deeply involved in his churhc. My sister travels to Salisbury every weekend to be with her church and friends there. Our lives are so separate and we rarely find the time or even desire to come together. We are missing those times where we have the freedom to do so before we really get committed to our own families and careers. Am I fostering a relationship with my siblings that my nieces and nephews will look at us they way I look at my mom and my aunt? Will I even play a large part in my nieces and nephews lives if I don’t play that large of a role in my sibling’s lives?

What we do in our present always has implications on our future. One of my strengths is futuristic, so I know I always look at things in the long term. I try not to do things that will only benefit me now, but look towards opportunities that will sustain in the long run. When my parents meet their maker, my siblings will be my continuation of them. If I don’t honor and value that relationship and gift now, who’s to say what will happen to us when the glue, my parents, are no longer with us.

What are those relationships and people you are missing out on? Who would you find on your missed connections page on Craigslist? I hate those general sayings like life is short blah blah, it actually isn’t…it’s the longest thing we do. But in that long time we are lucky to have, I hate wasting it by having those missed connections even with the folks closet to me: my family.