Every morning when I get off the MARC train, I see the same people. I see the same homeless people. When I exit the first set of double doors, there’s two men who sit against the wall to the left, one says good morning to as many people as he can while the other shakes his cup for change. When I exit the 1st street secret door, there’s three men who surround the door. The first man is generally sleep while the other two also shake their cup hoping for a friendly passerby. Everyone morning, the busy and well fed commuters brush past them ignoring their good mornings and hungry bellies.
I, too, am one of those commuters.
Yesterday a man stopped me when I was probably 20 feet away from my office. I thought not today sir, I’m almost at work. He went through this whole story about not having money to get back to West Virginia where he lives. He said he was trying to earn $17 to get back on the MARC train. He pulled out his identification and everything. With about $27 in my wallet, I lied to his face and said “I’m sorry sir, I don’t carry cash. Have a good day though.” I felt bad for a second, but went about my day. Something similar happened in Louisville at about 3:00am as a I stumbled home from the Big Gay Dance at ACPA, but I gave into his story so I could get home.
Today, I saw a busy and well fed commuter do something different. She did something that no one has done in my two weeks being here.
A tall, well-dressed woman stopped to the homeless man who greets the commuters good morning and the conversation went like this…
“Hey John! I brought you a sandwich” as she kneeled down and rubbed his shoulder. She didn’t hand him some raggedy McDonald’s sandwich. It was nicely wrapped so he could store some for later.
“Thank you baby! God Bless you!” said John as he graciously took the sandwich
“God Bless you too! You take care of yourself ok?” she said staring into his eyes, something most people probably won’t do. Ut prosim.
Every morning we rush past these people and ignore them. We get angry because they’re begging. We think they should get up and get a job. We put them into a box of people we just ignore. I’m guilty of it. I’m guilty of it everyday. This woman though, she didn’t let her time and life get away from what we all should be doing. She may or may not know his story, but she took the time to learn his name and help him. I always think I’m just a poor graduate student, I can’t help anybody. I just bought a brand new car, I think I can help someone. I don’t care enough to help.
We need those people who still care.
We are an unhappy and uncaring people. We are self-involved and only empowered by our own interests. We complain about providing for our own families and gripe at our children when they behave the way children should. We complain about our jobs, but smile and collect the paycheck every two weeks. We do everything but care on a regular basis. The folks who genuinely do care are often abused and taken advantage of to where their care no longer is seen as care to others but a plan b. My mother is one of those caring people, but my brother takes advantage of it to where she will always be one of those plan b in case his plan goes wrong. If money is a little short, “hey mom I need to borrow this much” with the expectation that she will agree. My mom emailed with one those spammers who want to use your bank account to transfer money for about a month simply to pray with that person and encourage him or her. I bet that was unexpected.
We need those people who still care.
I think the people we can learn this best from are children. When we get older, we become so complex. We become so complexly stupid. Children enjoy those simple things that allows them to care. A few weeks ago I got to play with my supervisor’s kids. Aside from my nieces, I rarely see kids. We played softball, chase, boogey man, and all sorts of games. They didn’t know me from the next person, but they played with me and took time to care about me in that moment. When they went to bed, they hugged me goodnight as if I was someone regularly involved in their life. They cared about me without their own interests in mind.
We need those people who still care.
In student affairs we talk so much about actively caring and doing this and that. Do we really care? I know when I have that paper due the next day, I do not care. Simple as that, I. Do. Not. Care. My job is to care, yet when I get so involved in my own business, I do not care. This happens all the time. We need those people who still care. We need them to teach us how to care. We need something to happen to make us care. When we do care, we become trend carers. For example, everyone was all about KONY. Who talks about it now? Who still cares? We get wrapped up in trend causes and will hashtag anything, but rarely do anything to truly actively care and participate in helping. I’m guilty of it all and who knows if even after this I’ll do something to change my behavior. I guess it’s not an overnight kind of thing, but I wish I cared more.
